This week, a colleague over at our sister site, UFP News, asked a question in response to a video he posted from Cosmopolitan model Charlotte McKinney who makes her living showing off her well endowed gazoombas:
Okay, so some of you ladies out there please help me to properly understand (because I’m a guy), why is it that a woman who has made a career out of flashing her large boobs at every given opportunity, would think that having a large rack is ‘bullshit’ ? The footage shows Charlotte McKinney bitching about the daily struggles of big breasted women, from strapless bras to button-down shirts, and admits they get a lot of unwanted attention. But she obviously knows that there are upsides to possessing a perky set of knockers, which she has made a career out of showing-off around the screen while at the same time condemning them.
For the full video of bull$#@! and Ms. McKinney demonstrating why this is the case, visit here.
Well, gentle reader and my dear colleague, this writer will not use the same description of the daily struggles of living with larger than average boobies, but I will second Ms. McKinney’s sentiments. It’s a pain in the backside (and the neck, shoulders, back, thorax…). The reason being, that natural big mammaries are heavy, and really are not meant to be suspended from the shoulder, or pushed up as the case may be, but to be otherwise supported by a muscle and tendon system that does not develop when we wear compression garments from the time the buds form. (In my case, age 11.)
As for Ms. McKinney’s specific complaints:
- Bra size – uh, DD is NOT the top of the scale and not all bras are made the same. The nitty gritty details won’t be included here since it’s on a need to know basis. Let’s just say a woman’s bra size should be a state secret, and outside of a monogamous relationship or a fitting room, no one else needs to know.
- Bra shopping – it’s called being manhandled and measured to death. Believe it or not there is a science to bra sizing, but all of us do need to try on about a dozen every time the old ones wear out. Seriously, not all bras are made the same.
- Stapless bras – at a certain point, don’t even try it. Go for a bustier if a cocktail dress or formal requires it.
- Sag- spend enough time in a bathing suit with minimal support and that will take care of itself. Gotta develop those muscles underneath. Remember the modern bra is barely 100 years old. Before that, sag wasn’t really discussed.
- Asking others about reduction – it’s not bull$#@! to ask about that. It’s rude. At this point, if we haven’t had one, we don’t want one and we each have our own reasons. What they are is NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS.
- Button down shirts – since we girls are no longer taught to sew, wearing button down shirts means we have to start in plus sizes to fit the body part, in this case the bust, and then have everything else altered down. Yes, it’s a pain, but it’s better than the gaps and the feeling of being laced into a straight jacket. Otherwise, knits are it. (And even then, food lands on the trampoline, not the lap when it falls off a fork.)
So, Richard A., there you have it. The Well-Endowed Woman’s agreement with Charlotte McKinney. This writer will not use the word bull$#@! when discussing dealing with the gazoombas, but seriously guys, they were put there to nourish children, not distract you. HEY! EYES UP HERE!